I am sure motherhood does have days that are full of all the magical things we could dream of, the days when you feel fresh and beautiful and you can just float through the day without distraction or interruption. But let’s be real, I think I can count those times on maybe one finger. The general chaotic lifestyle is one that I have become more a custom to.

I’m always trying to accomplish more and make better than what is already really good, maybe that’s why it feels chaotic. If I could only take some time, even if they are just a few moments more often, to slow down and absorb the beauty I already have built my life around. If I did this, I can’t help but wonder if I might feel more beautiful, more content, more satisfied. Less chaotic.

This topic brings up so many questions for me as I round the corner to 40 this summer. I see age in my face, I feel it in my body and the absolute truth is, I feel a touch insecure.

I want to appreciate what Motherhood and age has done for me but in the same sense, my vanity creeps through on occasion. I want to feel beautiful.

But really, what is this beauty I am wanting? Is it the physical beauty, the aesthetics of people, environments, and the wardrobe that people see when they look at me or my images of my family? Or is it the beauty in the connections between my daughter and I or the confidence I have within myself? That beauty, is it visible to an onlooker or is it simply what can be felt in that moment; the pure happiness and love that translates into beauty?  

I look through images I have taken and images others have taken in their Motherhood sessions and I can't help but think of these questions that I’ve posed. When Mammas ask me to create imagery for them of this particular time in their motherhood journey, what I want to create for them is a collection of images that showcase their own personal beautiful. It is a celebration of new beauty, a new lifestyle and one that is custom made for them. It is season in life I have true admiration and respect for. This is what I do believe, for every Mother I work with. It is a bit strange though how it comes so easily for me to look at another and preach it, yet to live this for myself everyday can been sometimes difficult.

But alas, this life is so beautiful! Your ability to love with every fiber of your being is breathtaking. You have given life, cared for and encouraged growth for your children. You are beautiful.

Tell me, when do you feel most beautiful?