In Home Fresh 48 | Colorado Photographer | Mama Stories
There are so many firsts when you are a mother for the first time, what I’ve come to realize is there are also so many firsts no matter how many children you have. Being a mom to one, I’ve thought, “oh another would be easy”, in the sense that I’ve already experienced this. Being a mom, no matter how many children you have is nothing like a day job where you master a new task or learn a lesson that becomes almost a repetitive event. EVREY day, EVERY task, EVERY feeling and EVERY experience is new. Rachel is the mom of seven beautiful children and I've thoroughly enjoyed reading her story and sharing time and space with her family. I hope you do too!
“Writing about being a mother was harder than I thought it would be. You’d think that after seven children the words and feelings would be easily accessible. It isn’t that there is a lack of words that make it difficult. It’s the overwhelming amount of thoughts and emotions that completely overtake my heart when trying to sum up what being a mother means to me. With every child that we’ve been blessed with, my life changes completely. Every child, pregnancy and birth has been a growing experience that not only came with beautiful reward but heart wrenching growing pains and experiences that stretch my heart a little bit bigger every time.
As the saying goes, "For when a child is born the mother also is born again.” (Gilbert Parker)
I don’t say it lightly when I say that every child I’ve had has changed my life. The pregnancy is unique - every time. The labor and birth - also different. And the first time I lay eyes on that baby no matter what number it is, is so new and exhilarating I honestly feel like it’s my first all over again.The journey forward together hand in hand is unique to that child, the learning curves, the bumps, the tears together, the things we laugh about, secrets we share and the growth that we experience.
With Liat our most recent child (7th), I experienced an incredible birthing experience at home. My pregnancy was complete bed rest for the last trimester due to complications with my water rupturing. Getting to term was a miracle I had prayed for daily and my heart’s desire was granted. The night I went into labor was unforgettable. All I felt was joy, sheer gratitude that I was finally having my baby not only term, but in my own home. As I paced the floor I embraced the contractions with an unspeakable joy. Every contraction I voiced positive affirmations and spiritual gratitude. All I could think of was that my prayers had been answered in the timing of her birth.
After 3 hours and 30 minutes of labor - for the first time ever my husband delivered our baby. It didn’t matter if Liat was our seventh - it felt as if it were our first. I cried tears of relief with our seventh just as I had done with my first. I was vocal as I laid eyes on Liat for the first time, “We did it.” I whispered in her ear joyfully, tears streaming down my face as I held her closely to me. I took in everything, her tiny clenched fists, the wispy wet newborn hair, the softest skin of her cheek against mine.
We had successfully completed the sacred journey of life being started - together.
There is nothing in this world like holding my baby no matter how many children I’ve had.
The silky newborn fragrance, the clenching of those tiny fingers over mine and the unforgettable experience of putting her tiny mouth to my breast for the first time. Holding my breath then the flood of relief and astonishment as I feel the tugging sensation of suckling. I have breastfed every one of my children and still - every time I feel that same astonishment that somehow that baby knows exactly what to do. That my body does exactly what it’s supposed to. My journey with breastfeeding has been different every time. From my oldest needing to wean at 5 months due to complications to my 4th child nursing til his 4th birthday. Each child so different yet equally special.
The joy of being a mother comes to me in different ways the more children I have. And I cannot even describe the happiness that bubbles up in my spirit when I watch my other children love on their newest sibling. It’s one thing to love your own child but to watch your own children love on each other is just breathtaking.
Motherhood is beautiful and painful all at the same time. It’s a privilege and gift that we’re handed with no experience that will ever prepare us completely. Being a mother is about loving unconditionally - through tears and exhaustion, feelings of failure and even fear. But the gift of it remains in the power we hold as mothers - the shaping that takes place under our nurture and care.
Being a mother is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It has required more sacrifice than I thought I was capable of. But I have experienced something priceless as I play my part in guiding these little souls. The privilege I feel in having a hand in creating some of the most incredible humans you’ll ever meet - make everything, every hard part of it worth it.
The growing pains haven’t always shown themselves pretty on me. Every day isn’t perfect.
But the growth and transformation of motherhood has shown me that the miracle of life and rebirth is not only in the birth of my children but of myself - every single time. “
If you are a new mother or expecting a baby, you may be looking for connection, for answers and for community. It is out there and I encourage you to engage and find what you need! Although every mother’s experience is different, we are all on the same journey. We {as mothers} want to feel secure, loved and protected and we want the exact same for our babies. The gift of motherhood will bring you every extreme emotion and all the little feels in between, embrace them and share them with a friend. You are helping her in so many ways.